When I was preparing for my first undergraduate voice recital, I was a nervous wreck. I felt pulled in so many different directions: excited to perform but terrified of what people would think of me, afraid to fail despite all my hard work, and shy but also craving the attention of a 45-minute solo recital. It was a confusing time. I also had a new voice teacher who didn’t believe in coddling her students. At the time, I really wanted to be coddled.
The week of my recital, I sat in the student lounge of the music building and sobbed. I don’t remember what prompted the tears, but I’m guessing it was because I was overwhelmed and didn’t know what to do next. I was stuck, and I wanted someone to fix everything for me. I wanted reassurance and sympathy. Thankfully, a good friend jolted me out of my funk by shouting across the room: “KATERI, WHAT DO YOU NEED?”
He was sincerely asking, and he definitely asked this question more than once, waiting for me to answer. It stopped my tears in their tracks and made me laugh. I had no idea what I needed! But the question was enough to get me unstuck and moving.
This week, we explore the diagonal connections between our limbs as a means towards releasing the abdomen and ribcage.
The beautiful thing about studying the Alexander Technique is that the work usually gives you what you need, even if you are unsure of what that is. The Alexander Technique helped me to care less about what other people would think of me, and taught me how to think for myself. Instead of constantly seeking approval, I now seek more meaningful connections. It also helped me to strengthen my back! While the Alexander Technique won’t shout at you from across the room, it has a way of asking the question: “what do you need?” while also providing some answers.
Keep showing up to your lie-downs. Trust that the few mindful minutes you spend on the floor each day will give you something, even if it is only a few minutes to rest. Trust that your time on the floor will meet needs you don’t even know you have. This season, the Alexander Technique has given me a way to reconnect with my friend from the student lounge. I am teaching him online AT lessons, and he is teaching me the art of songwriting. And surprisingly to me, I am getting something that I needed in both lessons: the energy and richness of exploring the Alexander Technique (reinvigorating my appreciation for the work) and a vehicle for creative expression that isn’t singing in public! I am very grateful.
Kateri & Alexandra
A comparison between my first voice recital in 2011, and my most recent recital in 2019. While age and experience are certainly factors, my study of the Alexander Technique helped me to feel more poised and present in my singing.
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